Transitions

Author : Nina Fuller
Transition. It's a word we read a lot in the world of special needs. I have five children and the youngest two have Down syndrome. My kids' names and ages are Jesse 25; Jake 23; Joey soon to be 19, Tess 11 and little Hope will be three before you read this. My three sons have had their own special needs but they never had IEPs.Jesse is 25, good looking, has a great sense of humor and yet is still single. He wants to transition out of being single. Jesse's special need is that he longs to be married and hopes God has a soul mate waiting for him. Jesse's not so sure. He wonders if maybe, just maybe, the woman that should have been his partner for life was aborted somewhere in the past twenty five or so years. After all, abortion has been legal in the United States for thirty four years. Is his perfect partner missing? Jesse is learning to trust God for every aspect of his life.Jake has recently transitioned to Connecticut. As a gifted musician with a "total package" (In the music business, I am told, that means someone with good looks, rock-star persona, great personality, and creative lyricist and guitar player all in one) Jake has that artsy-moody challenge. If his creativity is stifled, he falls into experiential depression which often has turned into clinical depression. Thankfully for Jake, with a lot of prayer and Holy-Spirit-fortitude, his sparkle has returned and he is completely committed to serving the Lord with his life, including his music.It has been a very difficult transition for me as Jake's mom to let him go. I must confess as Jake and his dad pulled out of our driveway the day they left for Connecticut, it took all my resolve to not frantically chase after the car like a mad dog, begging Jake to change his mind. Transition is hard on everyone.Joey, our 6'2" athlete and Academic Honors recipient, graduates from high school this week. Talk about transition! This is the same little guy who once said to me during the trauma of having an awful splinter pulled from his upper thigh "Mom, I know I'll have pain in this life but does it have to hurt so much?" Joey has been a mother's dream. But, there was that time he decided to run away at age 4. I just had to take a picture of him…he stomped down the stairs, out the door and down the street with his sleeping bag in one hand and his coca-cola long neck piggy bank in the other. He was prepared to live on his own! He never looked back.I don't want Joey to leave home yet. I love having him around. I have another confession to share with you. If I am honest with myself, one of the reasons I don't want Joey to live on campus next semester is that I'm not ready to transition to having just my children with special needs at home. I am dependent on this third son for "normalcy." I have loved sharing in his successes at school, on the athletic fields, with his friends, and the parental pride of knowing things come easy for him. Joey succeeds at everything he does. We seldom have had to help him with his homework. He always "got it." In fact, he was adding and subtracting time on a digital clock by age 3! I love being a "successful" mom. I don't always feel that way as I advocate and raise my two daughters with disabilities. I think Joey's transition is going to be easier on him than it will be for me.I suspect that King Solomon was in transition when he wrote the bulk of the book of Proverbs. I wouldn't be surprised if the good king's son was graduating from high school when the King wrote:My son, do not forget my teaching, but keep my commands in your heart,For they will prolong your life many years and bring you prosperity.Let love and faithfulness never leave you; bind them around your neck.Write them on the tablet of your heart. Then you will win favor and a goodName in the sight of God and man.Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding;In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight.Do not be wise in your own eyes (*oh, son of academic honors),Fear the Lord and shun evil. This will bring health to your body andNourishment to your bones."Proverbs 3:1-10 (*italics in verse 7 are mine)Transition happens. Let's learn to celebrate life and the changes that come our way! I'm heading off to the Awards Program at Joey's high school. He's put his piggy bank away and his sleeping bag is stored under his bed – at least until college begins in the fall.'Specially for You,NinaNina Fuller, founder of Living Proof Testimonies, is a highly demanded speaker at retreats, schools, youth groups, banquets, radio and television shows, Pro-Life events, and college campuses across the nation. Nina is the founder and director of SMILE on Down Syndrome, which is a network of support for parents with Special Needs children. Nina is the author of one of the most needed books in print today, Special Strength for Special Parents - 31 Days of Spiritual Therapy for Parents of Special Needs Children. Nina was a finalist for Mother of the Year 2006. She and her husband Andy have five beautiful children, attend Bethel Temple, and live happily in Newburgh, IN. Visit Nina online at http://www.NinaFuller.org
Keyword : Bethel Temple, Downs Syndrome, Special Needs, Nina Fuller